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So, the bandwagon done been jumped on, and now, I can call myself
finished with the Fifty Shades trilogy. If you’re unfamiliar
with the trilogy, click here. Otherwise, most already know that this
trilogy has been getting A LOT of attention lately – and, for good
reason, in my opinion. I think these three books have brought the
erotica genre into the bedrooms of many women who’ve never ventured
into such realms before. If these books have done anything, they seem
to have awakened a lot of women and given them a new outlet for those,
dare we say, dark and sexy thoughts. For that reason alone, I’m glad
so many women are reading the Fifty Shades trilogy.

But, before I get ahead of myself, let me start by saying that I’d
like to consider myself an avid reader. An avid reader of critically
acclaimed works? Um, no, not usually. I tend to dwell mostly in the
romance genre. I like everything from the classic romances like Emily
Brontë’s sexy but cray cray Heathcliff in Wuthering Heights to the
more modern supernatural romances like Vampire Eric the Viking from
the Southern Vampire Mysteries (otherwise known as True Blood on HBO).
Among all that, I’ve read a crap ton of fanfiction from various
storylines. So, I’ve read everything from the absolutely gut-wrenching
romances to the more “And, they lived happily ever after” romances.
Undoubtedly, within that spread, I’ve come across my fair share of
sex-scenes – everything from the PG to the XXX-rated.

When I first started reading Fifty Shades of Grey, I was already
familiar with the basic storyline and some of the darker adult themes
of the books. I was actually excited for the promise of a storyline
with such a slant as it would be something different. But, little did
I realize that my much anticipated dark and steamy book would actually
turn into an “And, they lived happily ever after” romance. Now, you
may want to stop here if you don’t want any spoilers…

With that in mind, truly y’all, did an innocent teenager write this
book? I think this Amazon review gets it spot-on:

“The main male character is a billionaire (not a millionaire but a
billionaire) who speaks fluent French, is basically a concert level
pianist, is a fully trained pilot, is athletic, drop dead gorgeous,
tall, built perfectly with an enormous penis, and the best lover on
the planet. In addition, he’s not only self made but is using his
money to combat world hunger. Oh yeah, and all of this at the ripe old
age of 26! And on top of that, he’s never working. Every second is
spent having sex or texting and emailing the female character. His
billions seem to have just come about by magic. It seriously feels
like 2 teenage girls got together and decided to create their “dream
man” and came up with Christian Grey.”

Personally, for as much hype as the Fifty Shades trilogy has
for being such a dark, kinky, BDSM story, I think the plot is rather
mediocre and contains a far-fetched amount of unnecessary angst. I
mean, the story is okay. It was tolerable and well-paced. But, then
there’s the sex. And, trust me, there is a heaping amount of sex being
had. Now, I’m not opposed to some erotica (if it’s well written). As
mentioned above, I was looking forward to something of a different
nature and knowing the hype, I was sort of let down with the vast
amount of “vanilla” sex. In my opinion, the BDSM realm was only
scratched at the surface. I must admit that this trilogy failed to
make me “bite my lip” as the female lead is apt to do… repeatedly… and
annoyingly.

That being said, whatever gets people reading is good. Whatever makes
women feel empowered is good. If this book has helped people in either
way, then, well, that’s truly good. And, so that’s where I’ll end my
first book “review”. Fifty Shades of Grey, I give thee 3.5 out of 5
stars!